What Is To Give Light Must Endure Burning

Something I’ve been pondering lately is how foster care advocacy work can intersect with both primary trauma and secondary traumatic stress. 

We had a training at the library recently, and the trainer said:

• We need to normalize compassion fatigue and secondary traumatic stress as part of our work.
• It would be inhuman if we learned about and experienced such painful things and had no emotions about it or didn’t care. 

The next step is figuring out what to do, to care for ourselves when that happens. Not IF. But WHEN.

Thinking About the Loss and Legacy of Pat McCollum

Patricia McCollum (Ms. Pat) was an Ohio child welfare trainer and a foster and adoptive parent. She fostered over 100 children, and was the type of advocate who always showed up to support. Above are photos of her at the 2010 and 2012 SW Ohio Thanksgiving Together events in Cincinnati.

In the words of one caseworker:

"The first time I met Miss Pat was after midnight when I showed up at her door with the most difficult client of my career. He was a 13 year old boy with a horrific past, had just been removed from his Nth foster home, and his only options for the night were the office, the psych ER, or this random foster mom’s house. Miss Pat said yes without hesitation and agreed to keep him as long as he needed. To my knowledge, she never said no to a child if she had an empty bed."

In the words of another: 

"I have personally worked with several young adults that were from her home. Ms. Pat treated every child in her home as family and that didn't stop when a child left her home. The whole McCollum family embraced the foster community and children. This is a great loss for everyone touched by her and for the whole community."

Statistics Don't Come From A Vacuum

Negative foster care statistics do not come from a vacuum. They are positively and negatively influenced by systemic factors. This chart provides examples. 

Decisions made in a vacuum are those that are made without the necessary data, information, or knowledge. They may also be made without the right people with the right perspectives, experiences, and influence.

It's important to consider the context of data when making decisions. For example, the educational outcomes of foster youth are impacted by systemic factors such as:

• 5 school changes on average
• Delays in enrollment
• Credits not transferring
• Never the same textbook
• Hard to catch up on work
• Some youth have IEPs
• Trauma undermines learning
• Delays in permission slips
• Feel discouraged; too far behind

A Fourth Loss: Kimberly Rhyan

The Columbus State Scholar Network is in my heart this week. This beautiful, loving community has lost three irreplaceable people in one year. 

Kimberly Rhyan created such a ripple effect everywhere she went that she literally inspired her own oncologist’s office. 

The seeds she planted with the Scholar Network have grown into oak trees with deep roots. Her work with the former HEMI program (which needs to return and/or inspire a similar program) will also always be treasured and remembered. 

Three Losses in One Year

It is raining in my heart today...

The state of Ohio has lost three foster care alumni this year:

• In March, we lost Alexis Smith.
• In June, we lost Jerri Braswell. 
• This week, we lost Nikki Chinn. 

We will weather through, as we always do -- but it's important to acknowledge that we have had so many losses within one year.

Footprints on the Road

Those of us who "age out" of foster care, kinship care, residential, and disrupted adoptive placements aren't just trying to build our futures, and make things better for others.

We are also working to put together the pieces of each of our pasts. This is a big deal - and this is a big journey.

Years have passed, but, as a big sister of the foster care system, I still remember this personal journey so clearly. I didn't purchase a car until after college and graduate school. I didn't want to spend money on the bus, and I liked exercise, so I walked everywhere.

There is a road in my hometown that I traveled so many times during my college and graduate school years that it should have my footprints on it.

As I walked up and down that road, puzzle pieces from my past would often come up in the form of memories, and I would jot them down on pieces of paper. So, not only was I getting from one place to another, but I was also quilting some of the patchwork pieces from my past together.

How A Bill Becomes a Law At a State Level

 

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Link to handout.
Link to tree swing diagram, which reflects the legislative process.

Family Privilege Vs. Experiencing Abuse and Neglect

 This needs to be talked about more often:

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