Picture Books About Foster Care

HELPING CHILDREN TALK ABOUT THEIR FOSTER CARE EXPERIENCE

A Child is A Child by Brigette Weninger, 2004. After two young frogs are abandoned by their parents, Mama Mouse mobilizes the entire animal community to help care for them.

Aunt Minnie McGranahan by Mary Skillings Prigger, 1999. Based on a true story; when nine orphans came to live with her, Aunt Minnie came up with a solution: "The oldest looked after the youngest, the ones in the middle looked after each other, and Aunt Minnie looked after them all.”

A Father Like That by Charlotte Zolotow, 2007. A boy growing up without a father lists the activities that he wishes they could share, and decides to grow up and become the type of father that he never had.

Foster Parents by Rebecca Rissman, 2011. Describes what foster families are and how they care for children who need help until they return to their original families or move on to a permanent family.

Goodbyes by Shelley Rotner, 2002. Simple text, accompanied by photos, explains that sometimes people live in more than one home, and that goodbyes might not be forever, but might be just “bye for now.”

Kids Need to be Safe by Julie Nelson, 2005. This book is designed to help foster children understand why they aren’t currently with their biological parents, and offer them hope and reassurance.

Let’s Talk About When Your Parent is in Jail by Maureen K. Wittbold, 1997. Having a parent in jail can be one of the reasons that children enter foster care. This book answers many questions that children can be harboring.

Maybe Days: A Book for Children in Foster Care by Jennifer Wilgocki and Marcia K. Wright, 2002. Provides a simple explanation for children in foster care about the processes impacting their lives, and acknowledges the questions for which there is no easy answer, such as: “When am I going home?”

A Mother for Choco by Keiko Kasza, 1992. A motherless bird searches for the right place to belong – and finally finds it with Mrs. Bear, who takes Choco into her loving home and introduces him to his new siblings.

Murphy’s Three Homes by Jan Levinson Gilman, 2008. A puppy who moves from home to home learns that it is not his fault, and finds a family who will love him even if he struggles to obey their rules.

My Dog Is As Smelly As Dirty Socks by Hanoch Piven, 2007. During their time in foster care, children often create Life Books with pictures and stories about their biological families. This book, while not specifically geared towards foster care, suggests creative collage techniques that might work well in Life Books. 

Our Gracie Aunt by Jacqueline Woodson, 2002. Initially reluctant to open the door to a social worker asking how long their mother has been gone, two children find comfort and safety at their Aunt Gracie’s house.

When I Miss You by Cornelia Maude Spelman, 2004. Various situations can cause a child to be separated from parents – for a short or long time. This book is a tool for caregivers to assist children of all backgrounds to share what it feels like to miss someone and problem-solve what to do while waiting to be reunited.

Excellent Foster Parent Video

Foster Families Use Your Voice

Navigating the Maze: Foster Parenting and Life: Foster Families Use Your Voice

My thanks goes out to foster parents and child welfare professionals who recognize the capabilities and potential of children in your care -- and are courageous enough to fight for them to receive support and services.

Please tell me more about experiences in advocating for foster children:

1.) Examples of when it has been successful
2.) Roadblocks when it hasn't
3.) Techniques that you have found to be most effective

Your insights will be used in a 2008 conference to 'train the trainers' of every county foster parent and social worker in my state. The information that you share can be anonymous.

Looking forward to hearing from you...

Ohio foster parents under scrutiny

In Ohio, since the death of Marcus Feisel, the state is looking more closely into the criminal records of foster parents, and figuring out how to manage the process of ongoing screening.

Marcus' foster father, David Carroll, had been arrested for domestic violence, but child welfare agencies did not know about it, because the only criminal background check for Ohio foster parents was at their initial certification.

Now, in Hamilton County, foster parents - and anyone over 18 living in their homes - will undergo continuing background checks. .

305 of Hamilton County's 750 foster children are living with parents licensed through the county. Those parents have been or are being checked.

While conducting background checks on their current Hamilton County foster parents, officials discovered that 27 licensed foster parents had been arrested on charges including welfare fraud, assault and domestic violence and child endangering.

Background checks have not yet been conducted on Hamilton County foster parents who are licensed licensed through private agencies.

The county is also working with law enforcement on an 'instant notification system' if a foster parent is arrested. All new foster parents are entered into this system. Current foster parents have 30 days to agree to register, or the county will remove the children from their homes

Another issue is that, throughout the state, communication breakdowns often occur between public and private agencies:

- Counties sometimes place children in private agency foster homes without communicating with private agencies, to make sure that this will be a "good fit" for the child.

- Counties refuse to disclose information to private agencies (e.g. counties refuse to place children with a certain foster family, but won't tell the private agency why).

- Three Ohio counties refuse to fill out dispositional letters for private agencies seeking information about foster parents.

Ohio will soon house all of their information about foster placements in S.A.C.W.I.S. (State Automated Child Welfare Information System).

Every state is "supposed" to have a statewide central registry for foster parents, but few actually have one.

Good news
Private agencies will finally be given the same information that public agencies are given. It will be kept in one place (ODJFS) to avoid having to contact all 88 Ohio counties, in order to find out if a foster parent has allegations against them in another county.

Information-sharing between counties and private agencies that provide foster homes is important because "level of care" is a huge issue.

It is not fair to the foster parents, nor to the children, to place a child with special needs with foster parents who lack the training and expertise to meet that child's needs (e.g. the Gravelles).

In SACWIS:
-Unsubstantiated allegations will be booted after 3 months.
-Indicated allegations will be booted after 5 years.
-Substantiated allegations will be booted from the system after 10 years.

Now, I realize that foster parents can be falsely accused, and that they don't want this to follow them around forever.

However, if a foster parent is accused of physical or sexual abuse of a child, and these allegations are 'substantiated,' should that foster parent have another chance to take in more children 10 years later?

According to state law, a felony conviction will preclude someone from being a foster parent. I know that assault on an adult is a felony conviction. What about assault on a child?

As a former foster child, my primary concern will always be the safety of children.

Sources:
Background checks turn up Ohio foster parent arrests: Child's death spurred closer look at system. Lexington Herald-Leader, March 5, 2007, pg. B3.
Brown, Jessica. Criminal checks get OK: Foster parents have 30 days to agree. Cincinnati Enquirer, March 8, 2007, pg. C1.
Foster parents get ultimatum
Coolidge, Sharon. Allow background checks or lose children, agency orders. Cincinnati Enquirer, March 6, 2007, pg. A1.
McCarty, Mary. Keeping track of foster parents vital. Dayton Daily News, March 8, 2007, pg. A4.

Michigan foster care system in need of reform

Two-year-old Isaac Lethbridge was removed from his parents on charges of neglect, and placed into a foster home by state. His parents, Matt and Jennifer Lethbridge, had already lost custody of Issac's eight siblings, due to neglect. Jennifer is currently pregnant with her tenth child.

Isaac didn't choose his parents - and he certainly didn't choose his foster placement, where he was beaten to death. He did not choose to be burned, beaten and sexually abused within this foster care placement.

Isaac was the third child to die under the state's watch during the last 18 months.

Recent suggestions that have been made by Michigan residents include:

* Accreditation: Less than half of the 500 licensed child-placing agencies in Michigan are accredited.

"The state should push for accreditation of the 500 public and private agencies involved in managing care for foster children. Even stricter than the federal requirement of licensing for care, this would bring much needed accountability to the system, giving agencies and caseworkers a clear set of guidelines for monitoring care - or risking the loss of their accreditation and jobs."

* Smaller caseloads and more strategic use of staff: Michigan caseworkers typically handle caseloads of 20 children or more, which is higher than the national standard. The department has fewer than 10,000 workers, and training funds have been cut.

"The state assigns dozens of workers to monitor case files to make sure agencies meet state laws. It would be more efficient to assign them, in SWAT team fashion, to complaints so that everyone knows what's under investigation and what's being done about it. This could help caseworkers with their loads as well."

* Mandatory psych evaluations:
"Now, the state puts potential caregivers and foster parents through criminal background checks and makes sure they don't appear on the state registry of people with histories of child mistreatment. Psychological tests, which cost at least $200 apiece, would help better judge the fitness level of people the state asks to care for its children."

* Watch out for 'collector families:' Illinois, which is being upheld as a model for Michigan to follow,their changed licensing rules to rule out placing more than six children in a foster home, except in rare cases. In Michigan, it's not uncommon for foster homes to have as many as eight foster children.

"Do more with less" always means money
Children's Rights, a New York-based advocacy group sued the state in August 2006.

Michigan's budget deficit is projected at more than $800 million for the current fiscal year.

Federal foster-care reimbursements to counties are less than they ever have been. Wayne County, which handles about one-third of all of the children in foster care in the state, now pays out an extra $40 million a year for foster children, due to federal reimbursement drop-offs.

More than 3 in 4 children entering foster care in Michigan do so because of parental neglect, not abuse. It is interesting to note that a few years ago, Michigan was considered a model for other states because of its family preservation programs. That was before funds were cut, and programs preventing maltreatment, including parenting classes, were eliminated.

There was also a "changing of the guard." Early retirements and staff reductions at DHS since the late 1990s have resulted in the loss of 4,000 workers - many of whom have been described as the most-seasoned and best-trained staffers.

Sources:
Photo from caica.org

Dickerson, Brian. How many chances do parents get? Detroit Free Press. Jan. 31, 2007.
Kresnak, Jack. System overhaul could be only hope - faster adoptions, smaller caseloads seen as solutions. Detroit Free Press, Jan. 30, 2007.

Valenti, Mark. Reform system to save children - tight budges are no excuse when foster children's lives are at risk. Detroit Free Press, Jan. 31, 2007.

Abusive residential treatment centers and foster homes

Not sure who annoys me more: Mercury Liggins or her lawyer

Photograph of Mercury Liggins

www.prisonpotpurri.com

Texas foster mother Mercury Liggins excelled in home studies, and was allowed to adopt not one, but seven children.

And she continued to collect $3,584 a month for their care during the ten months after she had abandoned them in Nigeria.

The children were found living in a Nigerian orphanage, by a Texas missionary. He first suspected they were from America when he saw them playing 'Go Fish.' His suspicions were confirmed after hearing them sing 'The Star Spangled Banner.

By the time the children were discovered, they were suffering from malnutrition, malaria and typhoid. Three children were too sick to walk.

Defense attorney Michael Delaney, tried to paint Mercury out to be the victim, and blamed the situation on her brother-in-law, who lived in Nigeria. "She trusted the wrong person. She feels badly for her kids."

Did Mercury feel badly when she physically abused the children in her care? Prior to her abandoning the children, child welfare officials investigated five complaints of abuse, between 1997 and 2003.

At the time, the children kept silent because Mercury had threatened them. After being returned from the Nigerian orphanage, the children reported that Mercury struck them with a black belt and an extension cord nicknamed the 'persuader.' Mercury also had repeatedly threatened to send them to Africa.

When Mercury was ordered by State District Judge Sherry Van Pelt to repay the money she had received for the children's care, her lawyer complained that, "It's a lot of money for someone who is disabled and jobless at this point."

Too bad Mercury didn't put some of that money in a mutual fund. $512 per month for each child might have added up to create a nice nest egg for her.

Before adopting the seven children left in an orphanage in Nigeria, Mercury also adopted two other children from a man she was married to from 1979 to 1990. She also has two children of her own, who reside with her ex-husband. A relative reported that Mercury treated her biological children well, but was miserly toward her adopted children.

Richard Laballo, a laywer at Advocacy Inc., has suggested that the inspector general take a closer look at 'collector families' who adopt large numbers of hard-to-place children and receive financial subsidies.

For a recent update on this story, please visit this link: http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/metro/stories/MYSA010807.01A.brandy_talks.3003d6d.html

Sources:

Adoptive mother says another relative deserted her kids. Louisiana Weekly. August 23, 2004.

American children abandoned in Africa, forced to beg for food. Louisiana Weekly, August 23, 2004.

Hughes, Polly and Melanie Markley. Latest crack in faulty system: Nigeria case furthers scrutiny of child services. Houston Chronicle, 2004.

Langford, Terri. 'Y'all are going to Nigeria.' Houston Chronicle, January 7, 2007.

Report: Abandoned children suffered abuse. Nigeria Daily News, August 22, 2004.

2006 Year in Revew: Foster Care in Ohio

Summary of the top two news stories regarding foster care in Ohio, 2006:

1.) Marcus Fiesel: A three-year-old autistic boy who died in foster care.

-In April 2006, Marcus was found wandering the streets of Middletown. Upon investigation of his mother, Donna Trevino's home, his bedroom walls and carpet were covered with feces and there was little food in the house. As the police took Marcus away, his mother said, "He's your problem now."

-During the weekend of Aug. 4-5, 2006, Marcus died when his foster parents, David and Liz Carroll, bound him by taping his arms behind him and left him in a closet over the weekend while they attended a reunion in KY.

-David Carroll tried repeatedly to burn the remains of Marcus' body. Liz Carroll staged an elaborate hoax, pretending Marcus had wandered off in a local park and was now missing. She involved the public in a bogus search of the park for Marcus.

-The Carroll's duplicity was uncovered when their live-in girlfriend, Amy Baker, turned them in to the authorities. What happened to Marcus inspired public outrage and led to an investigation of the Lifeway, the agency that placed the child. A task force was created to examine the role of Butler County's independent foster care board.

2.) Gravelles caging children: Michael and Sharen Gravelle reportedly took the following actions against the eleven special needs children in their care, for which they received $56,000 per year:

-Forcing some of the children to sleep in cages
-Dunking the head of a young girl with Down Syndrome into the toilet
-Forcing a boy to sleep in the bathroom for days as punishment for bed-wetting
-Hosing down children outside the house in 20-degree weather

The Gravelles lost custody of the children in March 2006, and were charged with 16 counts of felony child endangering and eight misdemeanor child endangering counts.

Not representative of most foster parents in Ohio
It is unfortunate that top two most publicized stories in the state of Ohio in 2006 were about abusive foster parents.

There are many caring foster parents in Ohio. I have met them through the Ohio Family Care Association and when I gave the keynote presentation at the statewide foster parent conference at Deer Creek, Ohio on June 24, 2006.

What needs to happen:
-Ohio database to share foster parent information. This is supposedly still in the works...

- When abuse is reported, staff must take it seriously. An 11-month-old boy named Nicholas Goodrich died on Dec. 12th after three prior abuse reports to Delaware and Franklin County. Franklin County did not investigate the abuse report because the child now resided in Delaware County... um, WTF?

Foster Family Christmas

What's going on with Australia and foster care?

I shall continue to post my notes and updates on contacts from the 2006 It's My Life conference. However, several articles about the foster care situation in Australia have recently captured my attention...

Alienating foster parents winds up hurting the kids
In Australia, the NSW Foster Care Association ordered a boycott yesterday in response to changes in the law. Up to 1,000 foster parents are predicted to quit the system, and hundreds more will refuse to provide emergency refuge for at-risk children.

The Department of Human Services wants to disclose the personal details of 10,000 foster parents and their families to birth parents with a history of violence and abuse.

Information would include foster parents' names, addresses, telephone numbers and workplace, as well as details relating to foster parents' birth children.

Community Services Minister Reba Meagher did not consult foster parents about the issue.

This news came just days after a large billboard was unveiled in Sydney, calling for more foster parents to volunteer over Christmas.

Foster Care Association president Mary Jane Beach responded that,"The people who draft these laws have no idea of the implications. They think it's like a family picnic."

Another proposed law, which was more popular with foster parents, would allow foster parents to adopt their foster children without the consent of birth parents. Beach said, "For too long, the interest of birth parents has been placed before the children."

In New Zealand, for example, over 23% of foster children lived in three or more foster homes in the past 12 months. 156 children were passed around 6 or more homes. Dozens were shifted between 8-11 homes within one year. These children need and deserve permanency.

Foster parents in the land down under have expressed an urgent need for better respite care, in order to provide time off when they need it.

Compensation for kinship care providers is also an issue
It is estimated that, in Tasmania, 8,000 children are currently being raised by their grandparents and that number is growing all the time.

Custodial grandparents save the state a lot of money -- especially since the 2003 federal goverment recommendation that kinship care providers receive the same financial support of foster parents has apparently been disregarded.

According to the articles cited below:
Custodial grandparents in Tasmania receive $28 fortnightly
Australian foster parents receive between $374 and $564 a fortnight, depending on the age of the child.

Curious to know what a 'fortnight' is? Every two weeks.

The rate for kinship care compensation has not increased over the past 15 years.

Lack of oversight leads to death
Baby Elizabeth Edwards didn't have to die. Her death was neither willful nor malicious -- just plain ignorance. Elizabeth was placed by her foster mother in a cot with a bottle in her mouth and surrounded by a U-shaped pillow.

The baby suffocated and choked on the contents of her stomach. Her foster mother wasn't an evil woman. She was trying to do a good thing. But, foster mother Janet Todd had never been educated about sudden infant death syndrome.

South Australia's only foster care placement organization is Anglicare SA. This organization has no minimum level of training for foster parents. Their training courses do not include infant care.

"Our training has tended to focus on attachment, loss and grief, behaviour management and the traumas associated with placement," Anglicare manager, Margie Battye, told the court. She said that Anglicare did not have the budget and resources to provide infant care training.

Tell that to baby Elizabeth.

Australia's foster care system is a problem that is not going to go away. The number of children needing foster care has increased from 15,000 to 23,000 over the past five years. Meanwhile, the number of available foster parents has dropped from 14,000 to 9000.

Sources
Edwards, Verity. Foster mum had no baby-care training: Foster parents were not shown how to care for babies before a nine-month-old girl died while in care in 2004, a welfare group has admitted. The Australian, Nov. 2, 2006.
O'Dwyer, Erin. Worried foster parents in revolt over new rules. The Sydney Morning Herald, Nov. 5, 2006.
Labour talk is cheap on foster care. Press release by United Future New Zealand Party, Oct. 31, 2006.
Vowles, Gill. Care shame: Tasmania's custodial grandparents are still waiting to get equity with foster carers four years after being promised it by the state and federal goverments. The Sunday Tasmanian, Oct. 29, 2006.

Children's Coalition: Bail Set at $250K for Foster Mother Melanie Ochs

Children's Coalition: Bail Set at $250K for Foster Mother Melanie Ochs

Foster issues in Ohio

1.) Recent articles in Ohio decry the lack of information-sharing:
- Biological parents are not allowed to see their case file, and thereby know the specific charges that are being leveled against them.

- Foster parents are not being given medical information about the youth in their care. As a result, foster youth have received multiple vaccinations.

- Lack of information sharing between agencies has led to poor (and sometimes deadly) placements for children.

2.) Butler County task force:
- In the aftermath of the murder of Marcus, an autistic foster child, a task force has been assembled to reexamine Butler County's independent foster care board.

- Their report is due on Dec. 11, 2006.

- This report will make recommendations as to whether this board should be:
a.) folded into the Ohio Department of Family Services
b.) privatized
or c.) continue as an independent board

3.) Columbus NAACP files grievance regarding foster care because children of color are overrepresented in the foster care system.

As a response, the following actions are being taken:
- Training social workers in the cultural values of different colors
- Distribution of multilingual CPS literature
- Recruiting caseworkers from black universities

4.) The Ohio welfare reserves currently stand at $893 million.
- This is higher than any other state.
- Meanwhile, Cleveland has been described as being "the poorest big city in America."

Although Ohio received federal funding to support kinship care, for example, time spent planning how to implement the program, and limitations on eligibility have led to this funding remaining largely unspent.

For these, and many other reasons, unspent welfare funds are a big concern.

5.) Need for increased foster and post-adoptive monitoring
- A couple in Clark County severely abused their six adopted children.
- A widow in Butler County had six adopted and five foster youth, whom she reportedly used as indentured servants.

To quote a West Chester foster child, "They need to examine the foster parents a lot better before they pass them off as foster parents... Every single foster system should have a caseworker come by at least once a week. Bad things happen real fast."

This young man and his sister had both been severely abused in his foster placement -- but, despite the fact that his foster father confessed, charges were never pressed against him.

More in-depth and ongoing checks on foster parents are needed, due to recent discoveries of licensed (and even awarded) foster parents with histories of theft, domestic violence, prison and sexual abuse.

Sources
Brooks, Candice. Foster care investigation big job. Hamilton Journal, Sept. 29, 2006, pg. A2.
Grieco, Lou. Boy's death spurring changes in foster care. Dayton Daily News, Sept. 22, 2006.
Ludlow, Randy. Accused couple: Authorities unsure why no one saw child abuse. Columbus Dispatch, Sept. 24, 2006, News pg. 1A.
McGurk, Margaret. Foster agencies hide behind veil of secrecy. Cincinnati Enquirer, Oct. 1, 2006, pg. 1B.
McLaughlin, Sheila. Agency overlooked foster care dangers. Cincinnati Enquirer, Sept. 24, 2006.
Program to help kids gets slow start. Columbus Dispatch, Sept. 26, 2006, News pg. 4D.
Pyle, Encarnacion. Addressing racial inequities in foster care. Columbus Dispatch, Sept, 29, 2006.
Suchetka, Diana. Millions for Ohio's needy unspent: Money reserved for foster care of children by relatives, family, friends. Cleveland Plain Dealer, Sept. 25, 2006.

Strengthening the oversight of foster care

I linked to FosterAbba in a recent posting, because there are many dedicated foster parents out there, with good intentions. Foster parents whose idealism led them to pursue foster care, and who experience emotional pain when foster youth are removed from their home.

I wish every foster parent were like that... but since there are some nefarious foster parents out there, there needs to be nationwide oversight over foster placements.

1.) Each state should keep track of deaths in foster care. This is not happening.

2.) If one child dies in foster care, all other foster children should be removed immediately. Two-year-old Allison Newman was placed in foster care in November 2004, due to maternal neglect. Her Michigan foster family had expressed hopes that they might adopt her. Social workers documented that Allison appeared healthy and happy when they visited her.
Two days after a caseworker visit, Allision was dead. The foster mother claims that Allison "repeatedly hit her her on the side of the bed in the course of play." However, Allison's autopsy has led to questions and doubts about this explanation.

To their credit, Lutheran Social Services removed other foster children from the home immediately. Sadly, this does not always happen.

3.) National information sharing when it comes to sexual and/or physical abuse by foster parents. If an adult sexually abuses a foster child in one state, he/she should not be free to do the same in another state.

In my state, they are exploring the possibility of a statewide database of foster parents, so that adults who abuse the children in their care in one county or through one agency aren't free to do the same in another.

Sources
Ferretti, Christine. Questions surround tot's foster care, Detroit News, Sept. 26, 2006, Metro, pg 2B.
Miller, Carol Marbin. No list of kids on mood drugs. Miami Herald, Sept. 23, 2006, Metro pg. 1B.

Wanted to share this posting from FosterAbba

Navigating the Maze: Foster Parenting and Life: Short Timer's Syndrome

Foster Parent Allegations

What exactly does it take to substantiate an allegation of abuse against a foster parent?

In court today, play therapist Susan Honeck said that she reported evidence of abuse four years before Ricky Holland was murdered by his adoptive parents.

Honeck had noticed a very deep rope burn on Ricky's wrist. Ricky told her that he had been handcuffed and tied up with dog rope. Honeck immediately informed Ricky's psychiatrist and filed a complaint with his social worker.

State officials dismissed Honeck's complaint as "unsubstantiated," and proceeded with Ricky's adoption. The Hollands were also approved to adopt Ricky's sister and two brothers.

Shortly after Honeck filed the complaint, Ricky's counseling with her was terminated.

Looking at it from multiple points of view

1.) The foster parents: To become a foster parent is to put yourself at risk. In training, foster parents are often told to expect allegations of abuse from troubled foster children. An Ohio foster parent has expressed her point-of-view eloquently in this blog: http://members.aol.com/fpallegations/

2.) The foster children: What if foster daddy is truly putting the moves on you? What if foster mom really isn't giving you enough food? Among the many wonderful and dedicated foster parents, there are some serious freaks and losers. like Ricky Holland's and Marcus Fiesel's foster parents, for example.

Being in foster care = lack of credibility. If you as a foster child report abuse, it might be viewed as lying, seeking attention, etc. -- even if you are telling the truth, and the abuse is truly happening.

"False allegations" are a concern because they discourage potential foster parents.

Yet, I must be honest and tell you that my primary concern is for the child or teenager in foster care. Please listen to them. Being in foster care does not mean being a liar.

Ricky Holland told his play therapist that his foster parents were abusing him. The Hollands were allowed to adopt him and three of his siblings. Now, Ricky is dead.

Sources
Bouffard, Karen. Witness: State ignored abuse - social worker testifies Ricky was tied up, handcuffed before Hollands adopted 7-year-old. Detroit News, September 20, 2006.

Foster care in the 'Land Down Under'

Foster care challenges exist on every continent
In Australia, it appears that the greatest challenge is the bureaucracy.

A national survey of Australian foster parents has found that 73% regard the attitude of bureaucrats and social workers as the "worst thing'' about fostering.

According to Freda Briggs, a child protection expert at the University of South Australia, "They are reminded frequently that these are the department's children and they are expected to provide physical care without becoming emotionally involved."

If Australian foster parents' views differ from the social workers, they are often accused of being too emotionally involved.

Glenda Lloyd, who has been the foster mother to over 100 children since 1979, quit the foster care system three weeks ago. She had punished a 13-year-old foster child by withholding pocket money and cell phone from the child -- and had been reprimanded for doing so by the department.

Another foster mother, Dilana, had a three-year-old in her care with a raging fever. When she changed the child's diaper, she saw evidence of sexual abuse.

Dilana's first instinct was to take the child to the doctor. According to foster care regulations, she had to ask permission from the NSW Department of Community Services. She made several calls and left messages. No one responded.

By morning, the little girl's temperature had soared to dangerous levels. Her body was limp in Dilana's arms.

So Dilana took the three-year-old to her family doctor.

When DOCS found out, Dilana reports, "They told me I was in big trouble. They said I could be charged with something. They told me -- and I'll never forget this -- I had abused her human rights.''

Deeming Dilana's actions inappropriate, DOCS workers came to her house thirty minutes after that phone call. They removed the child's toys, books and photographs, and carried the distraught three-year-old from the house.

Dilana and her husband tried to find out if the little girl who had been abruptly removed from their home had received medical help, but their questions were never answered.

Last year, the couple applied to adopt another Aboriginal girl, who had been born to a member of their extended family.

DOCS blocked the adoption, and charged that Dilana and her husband were not suitable parents. The child was given to a Chinese couple, and Dilana was forbidded to visit.

Dilana and her husband hired a lawyer. They assembled more than 20 references. They spent $20,000 on legal fees. In the end, they won.

Their lawyer, Michael Vassili, commented, "I was just stunned by the ferociousness, the bullying, of DOCS."

Caring, loving foster parents exist on every continent
Their efforts to advocate for their children in their care should be supported and valued. They should not have to fear retaliation for doing what is right.

Sources:
Overington, Caroline. Foster parents don't care much for social workers. The Australian,
Overington, Caroline. In strife for taking ill child to a doctor. The Australian, Sept. 11, 2006.
Overington, Caroline. Visit to doctor `abuses ill child's rights.' The Australian, Sept. 11, 2006.

Foster Children & Attachment

Ironically enough, just as I have been given the opportunity to be a "voice" for foster children in my upcoming trip to Seattle, I now have laryngitis. I am just praying that my voice comes back by the time I arrive on Friday!

Losing the Foster Parent
Because parental rights are prioritized, attachments between children and their foster parents are often ignored. The presumption is that the child can and will reunite with biological parents if at all possible.

Sometimes children who have been raised by birth by foster parents are sent back to biological parents who are effectively strangers to them.

Not only may children not have attached to their biological parents, but they also might have long-standing experiences of trauma with a parent. In these cases, children who have found sanctuary and built trust in a foster home are sent back to biological parents who have neglected and abused them for most of their lives.

Unfortunately, since the bond between foster parent and child is often minimalized, children who return home often do not receive supportive services to cope with the loss of the foster parent.

Meanwhile question remains: Will the biological parents maintain their progress? Or, will they fall back into old behavior patterns? It is vital in these cases to continue to monitor safety plans for the children after they return home. All too often, this does not happen.

Losing the Biological Parent
The reverse is also true. If parental custody is severed and the child is adopted, the child will still need time to grieve the loss of biological parents.

Even in the context of a loving adoptive home, with healthy meals, stimulating activities, support and resources, the child doesn't enter that home with a "blank slate."

Paradoxically, the more safe and secure the home is, the more likely the child is to grieve lost parents. Why? Because grieving is a process. Children can only begin to grieve within a safe and secure relationship.

Only within a safe, secure environment can a child:
-Face their losses
-Confront their anger
-Move past denial
-Emerge from behind a shield of detachment
-Recognize and resign themselves to the fact that any fantasies that they might have had about a reunion will not come true

This painful work usually takes place after a child enters a permanent home -- and at the very time that the social services often terminates services.

For both scenarios, follow-up services are essential. Losing either the foster or biological relationship might be very painful if the child has established a bond.

Source: Rebuilding attachments with traumatized children: Healing from losses,
violence, abuse and neglect by Richard Kagan, PhD.